The NFL Draft. The biggest day in the NFL that does not include someone hitting someone. Every year it seems like something outrageous and/or unbelievable and I'm sure this year will be no different. I am no expert or do I have inside information but this is how the first round will happen...
Pick #1 Detroit Lions
Who they should pick: Becky "The Icebox" O'Shea FB/LB
The Lions recently updated their logo to a more fierce Lion. The Lions are trying to get meaner and who better to start that trend then The Icebox? No one that's who.
Who they will pick: Matthew Stafford QB
They need a quarterback and he is ready to go now.
Pick #2 St. Louis Rams
Who they should pick: The Charleston Southern University Athletic Training Staff
Look, the Rams need to keep Steven Jackson healthy and who better then these guys? A lot of hype surrounding this crew and hopefully they can deliver.
Who they will pick: Jason Smith OT
Look, the Rams need to keep Steven Jackson healthy and who better then this guy? A lot of hype surrounding this guy and hopefully he can deliver.
Pick #3 Kansas City Chiefs
Who they should pick: Mark Sanchez QB
I know what you are thinking, "Andy, they already have Matt Cassel, why would they draft Mark Sanchez?" Well I will tell you. Matt Cassel was a backup his entire career at USC. Sanchez started at USC. It's pretty easy to see who is better.
Who they will pick: Aaron Curry LB
The Chiefs go with the sure pick here. Curry is for real and you can build a defense around a player like this.
Pick #4 Seattle Seahawks
Who they should pick: Michael Crabtree WR
Matt Hasselbeck needs athletes to throw too and Michael Crabtree is the best playmaker in the draft.
Who they will pick: Mark Sanchez QB
Seattle learned something last year when Matt Hasselbeck went down to injury last year, they are screwed. This is also the perfect situation for Mark Sanchez as he can learn under Hasselbeck until he is ready to rock. Seattle just needs players healthy and they will compete in the NFC West next year.
Pick #1 Detroit Lions
Who they should pick: Becky "The Icebox" O'Shea FB/LB
The Lions recently updated their logo to a more fierce Lion. The Lions are trying to get meaner and who better to start that trend then The Icebox? No one that's who.
Who they will pick: Matthew Stafford QB
They need a quarterback and he is ready to go now.
Pick #2 St. Louis Rams
Who they should pick: The Charleston Southern University Athletic Training Staff
Look, the Rams need to keep Steven Jackson healthy and who better then these guys? A lot of hype surrounding this crew and hopefully they can deliver.
Who they will pick: Jason Smith OT
Look, the Rams need to keep Steven Jackson healthy and who better then this guy? A lot of hype surrounding this guy and hopefully he can deliver.
Pick #3 Kansas City Chiefs
Who they should pick: Mark Sanchez QB
I know what you are thinking, "Andy, they already have Matt Cassel, why would they draft Mark Sanchez?" Well I will tell you. Matt Cassel was a backup his entire career at USC. Sanchez started at USC. It's pretty easy to see who is better.
Who they will pick: Aaron Curry LB
The Chiefs go with the sure pick here. Curry is for real and you can build a defense around a player like this.
Pick #4 Seattle Seahawks
Who they should pick: Michael Crabtree WR
Matt Hasselbeck needs athletes to throw too and Michael Crabtree is the best playmaker in the draft.
Who they will pick: Mark Sanchez QB
Seattle learned something last year when Matt Hasselbeck went down to injury last year, they are screwed. This is also the perfect situation for Mark Sanchez as he can learn under Hasselbeck until he is ready to rock. Seattle just needs players healthy and they will compete in the NFC West next year.
Pick #5 Cleveland Browns
Who they should pick: BJ Raji DT
Raji is the perfect nose tackle for the 3-4. But the Browns like to do what is not best for the team.
Who they will pick: Michael Crabtree WR
The Browns are eventually going to trade Braylon Edwards, eventually. That means they need a playmaker and Crabtree will do just nicely.
Pick #6 Cincinnati Bengals
Who they should pick: New York Image Consultant
The Bengals have needed a new look for years now. Maybe they can help.
Who they will pick: Eugene Monroe OT
They need to protect Carson Palmer better than last year. Monroe will help.
Pick #7 Oakland Raiders
Who they should pick: Greg Cannom
Al Davis needs help. Cannom won the Academy Award last year for best make-up. It's a start.
Who they will pick: Jeremy Maclin WR
Al Davis likes speed. Maclin has speed.
Pick #8 Jacksonville Jaguars
Who they should pick: Dr. Drew Pinsky
The Jags are having a lot of drug and alcohol related problems recently. Dr. Drew would help them overcome their disease and help them play football again.
Who they will pick: BJ Raji DT
BJ fills a need for the Jags with his size in the middle of the defense.
Pick #9 Green Bay Packers
Who they should pick: Greg Paulus ATH
Aaron Rogers needs a shootout partner, Greg Paulus is that guy.
Who they will pick: Brian Orakpo DE/LB
Orakpo becomes the outside rushing DE/LB that the Packers need opposite of Aaron Kampman.
Pick #10 San Francisco 49ers
Who they should pick: Andre Smith OT
They need someone to step in right away and protect Frank Gore and whoever throws the ball for the 9ers this year.
Who they will pick: Andre Smith OT
They do what I say, when I say.
Pick #11 Buffalo Bills
Who they should pick: Mitch Berger P
Berger is the greatest Canadian born NFL player, ever. He would bring a boost to the Bills fan base as they play a few of their games above the border.
Who they will pick: Aaron Maybin DE
Who they will pick: Aaron Maybin DE
Maybin is a slick rushing DE that has a motor that doesn't stop.
Pick #12 Denver Broncos
Who they should pick: Richard Davis
Pick #12 Denver Broncos
Who they should pick: Richard Davis
Davis is the creator of the bullet proof vest. Something Denver players could use.
Who they will pick: Tyson Jackson DE
Who they will pick: Tyson Jackson DE
Jackson is a pass rusher that the Broncos need badly. They could also use Mark Sanchez but couldn't we all.
Pick #13 Washington Redskins
Who they should pick: Edward Jones
Pick #13 Washington Redskins
Who they should pick: Edward Jones
Edward Jones is a financial advisory corporation. Daniel Snyder likes to spend lots of money of people and they never pan out. Edward can help.
Who they will pick: Michael Oher OT
Who they will pick: Michael Oher OT
Washington settles on Oher to solidify their protection up front.
Pick #14 New Orleans Saints
Who they should pick: Kim Kardashian
Who they should pick: Kim Kardashian
Now that Reggie Bush and Kardashian are a item, it wouldn't be too hard to get her on the team. And Ray J can tell you that she is a team player.
Who they will pick: Malcolm Jenkins CB/S
Who they will pick: Malcolm Jenkins CB/S
Jenkins is the best secondary player in the draft and the Saints need help very badly in this area.
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Pick #15 Houston Texans
Who they should pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
Who they should pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
The NFL is now a two back league and Beanie would complement Steve Slaton nicely.
Who they will pick: Everette Brown DE
Who they will pick: Everette Brown DE
The Texans want a pass rusher on the opposite side of Mario Williams. Brown is a safe pick here.
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Pick #16 San Diego Chargers
Who they should pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
Who they should pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
Again another team passes on Beanie Wells. Whoops
Who they will pick: Ray Maualuga LB
This is a very good pick for the chargers. Maualuga was the best LB in college football last year and I can't wait to see him and Shawn Merriman together
Pick #17 New York Jets
Who they should pick: Brett Favre
Who they should pick: Brett Favre
The Jets get the last remaining Quarterback that has first round talent. In 3 years Freeman will be playing for someone else.
Pick #18 Denver Broncos (from Chicago Bears)
Who they should pick: Greg Bach
Pick #18 Denver Broncos (from Chicago Bears)
Who they should pick: Greg Bach
This is Josh McDaniels' first head coaching job and he is a youngin'. Bach is the writer of Coaching Football for Dummies and should give McDaniels lots of tips on how to be a head coach.
Who they will pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
Who they will pick: Chris "Beanie" Wells RB
Wells is the perfect fit for Denver's rushing attack. The Zone blocking will allow him to pick his holes and with Shanahan out of the picture the Broncos finally have a Fantasy Runningback worth drafting
The Buc's need to be fiercer, meaner, angrier. They would really learn a lot from real life buccaneers and this can only be beneficial.
Who they will pick: Brian Cushing LB
Who they will pick: Brian Cushing LB
Cushing is a very nice LB with a high football IQ. Also, he likes to paint his eye black which is always cool.
Pick #20 Detroit Lions (from Dallas Cowboys)
Who they should pick: Dorothy from Wizard of Oz
Pick #20 Detroit Lions (from Dallas Cowboys)
Who they should pick: Dorothy from Wizard of Oz
Dorothy taught the cowardly lion that he can be brave. This Lions team could use the same treatment.
Who they will pick: Clay Matthews LB
Who they will pick: Clay Matthews LB
Matthews came out of no where and benefited by playing in the USC system. He is a very underrated player and the Lions will like their first round selections
Pick #21 Philadelphia Eagles
Who they should pick: Knowshon Moreno RB
Pick #21 Philadelphia Eagles
Who they should pick: Knowshon Moreno RB
They need another runningback. Now.
Who they will pick: Knowshon Moreno RB
Who they will pick: Knowshon Moreno RB
You know why.
Who they will pick: Hakeem Nicks WR
Who they will pick: Hakeem Nicks WR
Since the Vikes aren't going to trade up and I don't like Josh Freeman at all; they select Hakeem Nicks. He can do this.
Pick #23 New England Patriots
Who they should pick: Someone that when they pick them everyone says "Bill Belichek will find a spot for him"
Pick #23 New England Patriots
Who they should pick: Someone that when they pick them everyone says "Bill Belichek will find a spot for him"
They probably will pick someone like this so no worries.
Who they will pick: Vonte Davis CB
Who they will pick: Vonte Davis CB
Vonte helps out the Patriots secondary because Troy Brown retired
Pick #24 Atlanta Falcons
Who they should pick: Who ever ratted Mike Vick out
Pick #24 Atlanta Falcons
Who they should pick: Who ever ratted Mike Vick out
Arthur Blank should shake this person's hand. While at the time it seemed like that this would be the end of the franchise as we knew it, a guy named Matty Ice came along and saved the day, along with the franchise
Who they will pick: Peria Jerry DT
Who they will pick: Peria Jerry DT
Since the dirty birds traded for Tony Gonzalez, they no longer need an offensive threat. Jerry is the pick here to bolster their D-line.
Pick #25 Miami Dolphins
Who they should pick: Ray Finkle K
Pick #25 Miami Dolphins
Who they should pick: Ray Finkle K
All he needed was the laces out. He would have made that kick. Damn you Dan Marino.
Who they will pick: Darrius Heyward-Bey WR
Who they will pick: Darrius Heyward-Bey WR
The phins need some speed and more offensive weapons. Heyward-Bey would be a nice late in the round pick.
Pick #26 Baltimore Ravens
Who they should pick: Virtu Studios
Virtu Studios is a world renowned Spa and Salon. They just opened up a studio in the DC area. Joe Flacco, are you listening?
Who they will pick: Percy Harvin WR
Who they will pick: Percy Harvin WR
Naegle is a top agent for United Talent Agency. With all of the commericals that Peyton Manning is in, he needs the best agent to keep up. Sue will do just fine.
Who they will pick: Kenny Britt WR
Britt is tall and has good hands. He will be a nice replacement for Marvin Harrison.
Pick #28 Buffalo Bills (from Carolina Panthers through Philadelphia Eagles)
Who they should pick: Doug Flutie QB
Pick #28 Buffalo Bills (from Carolina Panthers through Philadelphia Eagles)
Who they should pick: Doug Flutie QB
With the upset of the draft, the Bills should take chosen native son Doug Flutie. Him and TO will get along great.
Who they will pick: Eben Britton OT
Who they will pick: Eben Britton OT
Bills need O-line help after the Peters trade. Britton is an Offensive linemen so it all works out in the end.
English would be a steal here. To bad he doesn't steal. Or shoot guns.
Who they will pick: Brandon Pettigrew TE
Who they will pick: Brandon Pettigrew TE
The Giants need a playmaker over the middle now that they lost Amani Toomer and Chedder Plax. Pettigrew is a steal.
She plays Deputy Chief Brenda Johnson on TNT's show "The Closer". I bet she could get Vince Young to spill the beans.
Who they will pick: Robert Ayers DE
Who they will pick: Robert Ayers DE
Ayers had one good year at the University of Tennessee, maybe he will have more good years in Tennessee. We will see
Tidwell would look really nice next to Larry Fitzgerald. Also, now that Fitz is on the cover of Madden, it's not a bad idea to draft a WR
Who they will pick: Donald Brown RB
Who they will pick: Donald Brown RB
The Cards need a runningback to sholder the load because Tim Hightower is more of a goaline back. Brown proved he can receive a lot of carries and still be ok.
Pick #32 Pittsburgh Steelers
Who they should pick: Kevin Ellison S
Pick #32 Pittsburgh Steelers
Who they should pick: Kevin Ellison S
Troy Polumalo is also on the cover of Madden this upcomming year. The Steelers should cut their losses now and slect another saftey out of USC.
Who they will pick: Larry English DE/LB
Who they will pick: Larry English DE/LB
English is the sleeper of the first round and he goes to the best team. That's not too fair now is it. New England should have drafted Enlgish and found a spot for him.
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